Tuesday, 27 September 2011

"Never let the fear of striking out get in your way" - George Herman "Babe" Ruth

If you let fear control your life, you will never get what you want.
Do you chose not to do something because you are afraid of failing? I know a lot of people do and I sure have. I try not to think that way anymore though. I mean, what good does it do me to not even try to do something I want to do?

I have friends who dream about meeting the Right Man or Woman, most people do. Only these particular friends have bad experiences from bad relationships in the past and now they are afraid to give it another try. The problem with that way of thinking is that if they don't try again they can never heal and they will never find Mr och Miss Right. If you are one of those people you need to read this!

To heal from that sort of experiences you need to put yourself in similar situations and learn that every person you meet and every relationship you have is different. If you tend to choose the same kind of partner, that hurt you or treat you badly in same kind of way, over and over again then you need to have a good look at yourself, but you should never ever stop trying. The hard truth is that if you stop trying you will never get it right. You might not get hurt ever again, but you will not be loved, or love, the way you dream of ever again either.

I have been in plenty of "bad" relationships, I have never been physically abused but I have been mentally abused in a couple of them and cheated on in almost all of them. It has never stopped me from trying again and again; it has never stopped me from giving the next guy a chance. Although I have a fantastic boyfriend and an amazing relationship now, I still struggle with feelings of insecurity sometimes. I still fear that I am not enough, or that I'm not able to love the way I want to be loved and yet I KNOW that I am enough to my boyfriend and that he does love me the way I want to be loved. So, you see, I do have the fear but I am healing every day thanks to what I have today, thanks to my lovely Man. But if I hadn't given him a chance, I would still be alone, wounded and scared and I would never ever have found the Right Man for me.

The same philosophy goes for everything you want in life. My fear of striking out got in the way of my dream about writing, but I'm not letting the fear win anymore. Fear is something that is fabricated in one's head; fear is something you can control. You are in charge and the biggest way of striking out is to not even take the shot.

To learn more about "Babe" Ruth read this and this.


Tuesday, 13 September 2011

"Success is steady progress toward one's personal goals" - Jim Rohn

Keep working towards your goals and love every part of your life, and you are successful.
What is success to you? When do you reckon someone is successful, or has a successful life? Do you think of yourself as successful? What are your criteria for success?

Whether you are successful or not is all up to you and how you define it. For me it is about being happy in all areas of life. You are not successful if only one or two areas are a success, although you are on your way. Everybody has to start somewhere.

If I take myself as an example, I believe that I am successful and that I have a successful life. I am constantly growing as a human being and I am working towards my personal goals. I have two jobs that I love, I've enrolled to a writer's course that I want to do and I am learning the language of the country I live in. Career wise I am a very busy woman right now and I love all the things I do. Unfortunately, that is not ideal because I do not have enough spare time or as much time with my boyfriend as I would like to have, but it is only for another month. The reason we don't have much time together right now is that he works daytime and I work night time. But we always have Sundays when we are both off, so it is workable for the short period of time it lasts. Why am I doing this? Well, it is so I can get the money for my courses and to bring in some extra money for the winter when I will be spending a lot of time writing and studying to get an even better life in the future. The Spanish classes will make it easier for me to find a good day time job and the writer's course will eventually help me support myself writing. I consider myself successful career wise because I am doing something I love so I can do something else I love even more in the future. I am, in short, happy in my career and that makes me successful in my work life.

I am also happy in my life in total which makes me successful there as well. I have a fantastic man that I love and that loves me, my son is doing well and I have an amazing family and wonderful friends. I love where I live and I love myself, just as I am, but I am always striving to get better and to make my life better. I am working for abundance in all areas of my life and I am happy when doing so. That to me is success.

So, are you successful in all areas of your life? What do want to change, and what do you need to do to change it?

Read more about Jim Rohn here.


Tuesday, 6 September 2011

"Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear." - Albert Camus

Respect is one of the keys to a fulfilling and happy life.
Respect. One of the most important words and meanings of life. Respect is of utter most importance if you want to have a good life. The big question is what respect is. I know a lot of people misplace respect with fear. In my own personal opinion fear and respect are two completely different things. I even believe that they have got nothing at all to do with one another.

After the riots happening in the UK last month I've had more than one discussion about the cause of them, more than one of my British friends have expressed the opinion that the problem is that people have no fear for the police. They also thought that the kids don't fear their parents these days. When they were kids they wouldn't dream about doing anything like that because they were too afraid of the cops but even more scared of their parents. To me that sounds just as crazy as the riots themselves. The riots happened because the rioters have no respect for themselves or anybody else. They have not been taught to respect other people and other people's properties. I didn't fear the police and I wasn't scared of my parents, but I was taught to respect my parents and the police, and everybody else for that matter. But most of all I was taught to respect myself, and I would never sink to disrespect myself that much. And I taught my son about respect too, he’s got no fear for me and never had. He never did anything bad to anybody else, or himself, because he’s got respect for himself and others. Also, my parents respected me for who I am, and was, and I have always had a great respect for my son for being exactly who he is. That is one of the keys, you can not be respected by someone you don't respect. It all starts with you!

I don’t think that respect can be based on fear, because fear is fear and respect is respect. There is a big difference. I respect myself, and I do it because I deserve it. I have fought hard and done my best most part of my life. I have not always done the best thing and I have made a lot of mistakes too, but at the end of the day I have come out with both feet on the ground always learning how to become a better person in all areas of life. I respect myself tremendously for that, and because I earned my own respect other people respect me too.

Because I can respect myself I also respect other people. I know how to differ between respect for a person or for a person's act. I can respect an act without respecting the person, and I can respect a person without automatically respecting every act of that same person.

I would never be able to respect someone that tries to demand respect by trying to make people scared of him/her. By making people fear you, in my opinion, you lose all rights to be respected. Respect yourself and respect others, for who you are and for who they are, and people will respect you. It is as simple as that.

To learn more about Albert Camus, read this, this or this.