10 Reasons Why You Would Want To Be You. “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” – Dr Seuss

Society, parents, schools, friends and sometimes even you yourself try to fit you into a mold, form or shape of their idea of what a good human being is. This will make most people confused and might be the biggest reason for people being unhappy today. There are, however, plenty of good reasons for you to find yourself and to stay yourself throghout the rest of your life.

 Dare You To Move - Switchfoot

Here are 10 reasons why you would want to be you:

1. If you are your true self, nobody will be able to think of you as, or call you, a fake and be right about it. There will always be someone out there that doesn't like you, that calls you names or tells untrue stories about you, but as long as you are yourself they will never be right. You will always be the winner in those situations.

2. It is so much easier to remember your opinions and standpoints in different situations if they are your own. Lying is not being honest and not being yourself. If you tell a lie you will to remember what you said. If you are you you are truthful and it doesn't matter if you remember it or not, because it was the truth and you know it.

3. You can never ever be someone else better than they are themselves anyway so why put your energy on it. Not being able to be the best of who you are is painful, and if you are somebody else you will never be the best. It will always be painful in the end. At least if you are yourself you have a chance of being the best of who you are.

4. Nobody else can be you better than you can, so why not be you. Just as you can never be somebody else better than they are themselves, someone else can never be you better than you are. This means that if you are somebody else, you as you are meant to be, will never be.

5. You can never live your dream life if you are not you. You have a dream life somewhere waiting for you, but you will never live it unless you start being you. No matter what your dream life is. If you are not you, you will not live your dream life. You might live someone else's, but your life will never be lived.

6. When you achieve something, reach a goal it is so much nicer to do it as yourself than as somebody else. If you achieve something when you are not you it is not you achieving it. When you reach a goal when you are not you it is not you reaching the goal. The reaching and achieving might be nice, but it will never as great as it is when you achieving something or reach your goals as yourself.

7. It is impossible to know what your dreams and goals are if you are not you. What are your dreams specifically? Are they truly your dreams and goals or are they a product of everybody, or at least somebody, else's dreams and goals? You will never know what your real dreams and goals are in life if you are not you living your life. Why would you want to achieve a goal that isn't yours?

8. Being somebody else in your body will eventually be a complete mismatch and your body will start to revolt. Your body is your temple. You can not change your body and your looks into someone else's, unless you have a lot of plastic surgery done, If you are someone else, your body will still be yours and some time down the road your body will start to disagree with the fact that you are not being you living your life fulfiling your dreams. How your body will show you that will differ from person to person, but if you listen to it it will tell you. You are not supposed to be in pain, if you are something is wrong with the inner being inside you.

9. You only have one life, that you know of, and why would you want to live that life as someone you are not. Even if you believe in reinkarnation it is highly unlikely that you will remember it from life to life. You need to do with this life the best that you can, and you need to do it as yourself. Why would you want to waste your one life on being something or someone your not, living up to other peoples expectations and fulfilling other people's dreams when you can live up to your own expectations and fulfill your own dreams.

10. You will never ever be truly and deeply happy as someone you are not. Everybody wants to be happy, it is the essence of life itself, but how can you ever be truly happy if you are not you? If you live your life listening to everybody but yourself you might end up having a somewhat good and comfortable life, but on the day you die what you will regret mostly will be all the times you didn't follow your own wishes, feelings and dreams. Follow your own heart is being yourself, Being yourself is being happy.

Do you agree with me? Or do you disagree? What are your thoughts and feelings about this subject? Are you being you, living your dream life, fulfilling your own dreams? Have you got any other reason that I didn't list here? Please, leave a comment and let me know what you think. 

To read more about Dr Seuss follow this and this. 
Lyrics to "Dare You To Move"- by Switchfoot

Love
Carina 

"Man, alone, has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man, alone, can dream and make his dreams come true." - Napoleon Hill

You have got the power to make your dreams come true. Are you using that power?

We, as human beings, have the possibility to dream and the power to make our dreams come true. I know that because I have done it my whole life; although it took me quite a long time to realise what my dreams were.

My son is my first dream coming true, although I wasn't really aware of it back then. I have young parents myself and I always wanted to become a young mother, I didn't expect to be quite as young and alone, but there he was; my beautiful baby boy. 22 years later he is still my baby and I couldn't be more proud of him.

My second dream coming true is to live abroad, by the ocean in the sun. That dream came true two and half years ago out of a sudden decision in chaos. The cold and dark weather in Sweden never did appeal to me, although I can enjoy cuddling up in the sofa under a rug with candles lit and a nice book to read. I can that here too, though.

My third dream coming true is to meet my dream man. I did and he is no longer in my dreams but in my reality and my every day life and I am loving and enjoying every second of it. He is everything I ever wanted in a man but more and better.

My fourth dream coming true is to make money writing, and this dream is coming true right now. My new job gives me that opportunity. That's all I can say about it at the moment since it's so fresh that it hasn't really sunk in yet.

I am now looking forward to whatever dream it is that will come true next, because I am positive I have got more coming to me.

With exception of my first dream coming true when I was very young (although that was a part of the dream) it took me a long time to have the rest of them come to me. I am sure that is because I wasn't ready for them earlier. I think you need to be in the right state of mind and the right state of believing in yourself and your dreams for them to come true.

What state of mind and state of believing in yourself and your dreams are you in? Are your dreams coming true?

To learn more about Napoleon Hill, read here.Mr Hill was born 128 years ago today, so Happy Birthday to him!

Love

Carina

"Never let the fear of striking out get in your way" - George Herman "Babe" Ruth

If you let fear control your life, you will never get what you want.

Do you chose not to do something because you are afraid of failing? I know a lot of people do and I sure have. I try not to think that way anymore though. I mean, what good does it do me to not even try to do something I want to do?

I have friends who dream about meeting the Right Man or Woman, most people do. Only these particular friends have bad experiences from bad relationships in the past and now they are afraid to give it another try. The problem with that way of thinking is that if they don't try again they can never heal and they will never find Mr och Miss Right. If you are one of those people you need to read this!

To heal from that sort of experiences you need to put yourself in similar situations and learn that every person you meet and every relationship you have is different. If you tend to choose the same kind of partner, that hurt you or treat you badly in same kind of way, over and over again then you need to have a good look at yourself, but you should never ever stop trying. The hard truth is that if you stop trying you will never get it right. You might not get hurt ever again, but you will not be loved, or love, the way you dream of ever again either.

I have been in plenty of "bad" relationships, I have never been physically abused but I have been mentally abused in a couple of them and cheated on in almost all of them. It has never stopped me from trying again and again; it has never stopped me from giving the next guy a chance. Although I have a fantastic boyfriend and an amazing relationship now, I still struggle with feelings of insecurity sometimes. I still fear that I am not enough, or that I'm not able to love the way I want to be loved and yet I KNOW that I am enough to my boyfriend and that he does love me the way I want to be loved. So, you see, I do have the fear but I am healing every day thanks to what I have today, thanks to my lovely Man. But if I hadn't given him a chance, I would still be alone, wounded and scared and I would never ever have found the Right Man for me.

The same philosophy goes for everything you want in life. My fear of striking out got in the way of my dream about writing, but I'm not letting the fear win anymore. Fear is something that is fabricated in one's head; fear is something you can control. You are in charge and the biggest way of striking out is to not even take the shot.

To learn more about "Babe" Ruth read this and this.

Love
Carina

"Success is steady progress toward one's personal goals" - Jim Rohn

Keep working towards your goals and love every part of your life, and you are successful.

What is success to you? When do you reckon someone is successful, or has a successful life? Do you think of yourself as successful? What are your criteria for success?

Whether you are successful or not is all up to you and how you define it. For me it is about being happy in all areas of life. You are not successful if only one or two areas are a success, although you are on your way. Everybody has to start somewhere.

If I take myself as an example, I believe that I am successful and that I have a successful life. I am constantly growing as a human being and I am working towards my personal goals. I have two jobs that I love, I've enrolled to a writer's course that I want to do and I am learning the language of the country I live in. Career wise I am a very busy woman right now and I love all the things I do. Unfortunately, that is not ideal because I do not have enough spare time or as much time with my boyfriend as I would like to have, but it is only for another month. The reason we don't have much time together right now is that he works daytime and I work night time. But we always have Sundays when we are both off, so it is workable for the short period of time it lasts. Why am I doing this? Well, it is so I can get the money for my courses and to bring in some extra money for the winter when I will be spending a lot of time writing and studying to get an even better life in the future. The Spanish classes will make it easier for me to find a good day time job and the writer's course will eventually help me support myself writing. I consider myself successful career wise because I am doing something I love so I can do something else I love even more in the future. I am, in short, happy in my career and that makes me successful in my work life.

I am also happy in my life in total which makes me successful there as well. I have a fantastic man that I love and that loves me, my son is doing well and I have an amazing family and wonderful friends. I love where I live and I love myself, just as I am, but I am always striving to get better and to make my life better. I am working for abundance in all areas of my life and I am happy when doing so. That to me is success.

So, are you successful in all areas of your life? What do want to change, and what do you need to do to change it?

Read more about Jim Rohn here.

Love
Carina

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." – George Bernard Shaw

Your life is your creation.

There are so many ways to look upon life, and every person has their own view or views. I have more than one view and this quote states one of them. Those of you that have been following Quality Inside And Out knows that I am all about personal responsibility of your own life. It is all up to you how your life was, is or will be. You create it and you create yourself. There is no blame, only lack of knowledge.

So, who do you want to be? What kind of person do you admire? What would you like to do? What type of partner do you want to spend your life with? Do you want to spend your life with someone? What is happiness to you? Do you think you are lost in life? How much money do you want to have? What would you do if you had a lot of money?

These are all good question that are worth asking yourself. I can only help you answer one of them. Do you think you are lost in life? If you think so, you are wrong. Life isn't place where it is possible to get lost, because you control it. You control where you are and who you are. So stop looking for yourself and start creating yourself.

Personally I believe that as soon as you acknowledge the fact that you are in charge of yourself, who you are and where you are in life, you will start to change automatically and by default. You can't help not to. I believe that we all have an inner urge to be the best that we can be. Sure, there are some people that will fight that feeling because they are unsecure and scared of what might come out of it. Don't be. I don't believe it is possible for people to change into something worse then they are if they are striving to be better. The trip might not be straight ahead full speed the whole time, but at times it will be. Sometimes the road will be very bumpy and sometimes the road you're on will be closed so you will have take a detour. That is not a bad thing. That is when you will learn the most about how to create yourself into who you want to be.

I've been on this trip as long as I can remember, and I will keep being on it for the rest of my life. I change, the world around me change, my needs and wants change, my inspirations change, well, everything change. I love changes, because changes allows me to see and/or do something new, it will create new visions and new goals. Or it will give me a new way to get to my goal. What I do with it is all up to me, I will create the end result of it.

I am creating me, and I know I will love the end result. I know so because I love every step on the way, whatever it is that I want in life I am getting it because I only want what I love, so I will love the end result whatever it will be. Will you be pleased with the end result of you?? Or will you love it?

To learn more about George Bernard Shaw follow this link, or read here or here.

Love Carina

"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step." - Martin Luther King Jr.

You don't need to see the whole staircase to take the first step.

This is one of my favourite quotes because it reminds me of that I don't have to know what's coming after the next step. All I can do is to take one step at a time. That doesn't mean that I can't have a goal in sight, it only means that the road to the goal has to be open for what ever shows up on the way there. It reminds me of not being afraid of what might happen sometime in the future. It reminds me not to be afraid of failure, because the failure might not come. It also reminds me not to be scared of success, because success is my goal.

Right now, at this time in my life, at this specific moment there is nothing to fear. Because I am where I am and nothing can ever change that. A while ago I wasn't where I am today and if I had been scared of being where I am today I might not have taken the step to get here. That would have been a shame, there is nothing scary where I am today, quite the opposite. I like being here, it is a good place to be. I like this step, but then again, I have liked every step I've been at. I have to, I created them and it would be stupid to create something for myself that I didn't like.

The quote is also telling me that there is only one step at a time. If I take one step, it will be my first step. When I am on that step I can, when time is right, take the next step. However the next step is only one step too and it's your choice how you look upon it. I choose to see every step as the first step, because whatever step I am on, the next step is only one step away. And I can never go back to the steps I've already been on. Why would I want to? Those steps are not for me anymore, I outgrew them. I can only take one step at a time, so why try to take more than that, why try to think several steps ahead. Things might change on the next step, so that whatever I had planned for "step two" is no longer relevant.

Know what your goal is, at least roughly. I know that my goal is to support myself on my writing. I don't know at this point in my life what kind of writing, I don't know how it will come about or when it will happen. I just know that it will happen. A few months ago my first step was to start a blog, well, I did that and here I am, on that step. Not until I got to this step did I know what my next step is. My next step is to enrol to the writing course. What the step after that will be I do not know. And I don't need to know. I can only live my life right now. And right now I am enjoying the step I am on. Right now I know what my new first step will be. When I am on that step, I will learn to know what my next new first step will be. When the time is right. I am not wasting my time trying to figure it out. I will know when I get there, when the time to move up another step is there.

I can't see the whole staircase, I can only see the contours of my goal. It is enough for me to know that it is there and all I have to do is to just take the first step and don’t worry about the next step on the staircase!

To learn more about Martin Luther King Jr, read here and here.

If you wait, all that happens is that you get older. - Larry McMurtry

Don't wait until you're dead to follow your dreams. Time is ticking.

About six months ago I admitted to myself that my life long dream is to write. Somewhere inside of me I've always known that, but I have been suppressing it my whole life. From the moment I learned how to read I spent most of my time reading. I didn't, like most kids and teenagers, spend most of their free time hanging out with friends, but I spent it closed up in my room reading. Whenever someone asked me what my passion in life is the thought of writing flashed through my head, but every time I pushed it away as quickly as it showed up and then I'd answer the question with; “I don't know, I don't think I have one.”

Anyway, about six months ago I was doing a lot of "soul searching" and I was finally able to admit to myself that I wanted to write. My wonderful boyfriend suggested that I would look up online courses and a friend that is into writing suggested one that she's doing. I looked at it and I really liked it. However, it isn't a free course even though it is not that expensive either, especially not for what you'll get for the money. Although, at that time I didn't have any spare money to spend on something like that and I put it on the future. One day, when I make more money. First I have to…. And so on. Well… Nothing is ever going to happen thinking like that.

About a week ago I made the decision of enrolling for the writer's course at the end of this month and it feels so right, and so good. They have a couple of different instalment options, so I decided to do one of those since I don't have the money to make a full payment at once. The instalment will cost me about 40 euro a month for 10 months? And that's all. So, that is what I am going to do for the next four years. (As well as working) It is a four year course and I will have a personal tutor, it will teach me about agents, and copyrights, about several different sorts of writing; non-fiction, fiction, articles, interviewing, writing for TV and radio and a lot more. It will definitely be worth the money.

The funny thing is that the day after I made the decision to not wait any longer, I stumbled over another job. It's a full time job, for about 2 months, that I can do on top of my normal work. It will give me the money to pay the full enrolment fee at once and it will also allow me to spend time writing during the winter. I've been waiting for something like this to show up so I can enrol, but not until I decided to do it anyway did this opportunity come along. Cool huh??!!

I definitely feel that I am going in the right direction with this and it is making me so happy! I'm really looking forward to the day I enrol and I get the first books and instructions. Why wait, all that happens is that I get older! And when you decide to follow your dreams, no matter what, something will come along to help you on your way! Your dreams are there for a reason, you are supposed to follow them, that is what I finally realised.

What are your dreams? Are you pursuing them? If not, then why not? What can you do to take a step towards your dream? Why are you waiting and what are you waiting for? Try do answer these questions, they might tell you a lot about yourself and how you look upon life.

Love
Carina


You can read about Larry McMurtry here and here.

The Optimist Creed (part 4,5 and 6)

Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. - Christian D. Larson

This is the next three parts of "the Optimist Creed" by Christian D. Larson. Here are the first three, and here is the whole creed.

*Promise yourself to look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

When something happens in my life, I always try to find something positive about it. I lost my job once, and I was sad and surprised at first, but I also saw that I wasn't happy there and I had already decided to try to find another job in a few months time. So I started to think that maybe this was what I needed to get to that point. Within a week or two I'd been asked to help out at another place, less hours more money. Even though it was only a temporary job I wouldn't have heard about it if I wasn't available. I think that whatever happens, it does so for a reason that you might not be able to see right there and then, but it will lead you closer to what you want in life. So look at the sunny side of life, it makes life easier and more fun.

*Promise yourself to think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

Do you expect the best or do you expect less than that? Most people expect less than the best because of the limiting beliefs they have. (I will get into the subject of limiting beliefs some other day) But if you think of the best, work for the best and expect the best, you will eventually get the best. The best for you, not the best for somebody else. You will get what you expect, as I've mentioned before. Do you think you are the best? I think I am the best, nobody can be me better than I can. And nobody can be you better than you can. So if I'm the best I deserve the best, so I expect the best (and I get the best)

*Promise yourself to be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
If your friend lands a job you'd like, or finds the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend, or have the most fantastic house, or body, how does it make you feel? Are you genuinely happy for your friend, are you jealous or do you hold a grudge? Holding a grudge is not the same thing as being jealous. Holding a grudge is being jealous AND wanting the job INSTEAD of your friend. It is to NOT want your friend to feel the joy and happiness of getting/having it. Being jealous simply means that you would like it TOO. See the difference? Well, the best thing is neither of them though; the best alternative is to just be happy for your friend. Honestly and lovingly happy! Because the truth is that there are enough good things out there to go around. So you didn’t get that job, you’ll get something else; at least your friend is happy. Be happy and enthusiastic about the success of others and you're more likely to be successful too.

"I'm hungry for a juicy life. I lean out my window at night and I can taste it out there, just waiting for me." - Brigid Lowry

If you can taste your future life in the air, you need to go get it.

I have heard so many people say something like this. I used to say it. I used to feel that there was something more out there, something waiting for me, calling me. I never knew what it was though, but I could taste it in the air, especially if I was sitting on the balcony a nice spring night. I don't feel that anymore, because I know that whatever is out there I'm heading its way. And also, I did change my life; I followed my heart to find myself and my life.

But let's get one thing clear, your life will not find its way to you without you moving towards it. It may meet you on the way but it's not going to do all the travelling. You need to put your thought on to it, your focus; you need to find out what you want, which road you want to go. You might change your mind half way there and take the next exit off that road, but that exit will lead you on to another road and even closer to your goal. If you are somewhat clear that you want to find whatever it is that is out there. It took me years of wondering and thinking for me to find out what I really want out of life. I always knew I wanted to be happy and that I wanted a really nice guy in my life, but I never knew what it was that would make me happy and I never made it clear to myself what a nice guy is. I've got both happiness and the perfect guy now, because I made it clear in my head and my heart what it was I wanted.

Every time I've thought about what my passion is, what I want to do that makes me burn, the thought of writing has flashed by. Just a quick flash, because I've always pushed it back, telling myself that I wouldn't be any good at it and I would never be able to make any money doing it.. About 6 months ago I finally admitted to myself that writing is what makes heart bounce, that is what I want to do and as long as it makes me feel good I don't have to make money from it. Even though that is what I want in the end.. I am still trying to figure out what type of writing I want to do, I'm still trying to convince myself that I am good enough at it. In my heart I know that I am, I just have to convince head. And still, writing is what I do here, so I'm on my way. On my track of life. I am already doing it, right?!

The point I want to make is that if you have that feeling, that you want a juicy life, that you can taste it out there, you really need to go for it because it's not going to come to you on its own. Take the chance, the worst thing that can happen is that you want to go back to where you are now. Although I don't think you will, I think you will find something better.

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” - Author Unknown

The future is a goal, the past is the past

You can’t change your past, I think everybody agrees with that, right?! So what do you do when you don’t like it, your past? When you think you had a lousy childhood, when your dad wasn’t around, when you were bullied in school. What do you do when boyfriend after boyfriend cheat on you, or you where too fat or too skinny? Or even worse things. The way I see it you’ve got two choices. Your first choice is to keep disagreeing with it and as a result feel bad about whatever you do in your life. Your second choice is to accept it, pick out the good parts of it, learn from the bad (and the good too, of course) and move on to today and the future.

All those things are what make us stronger today, if we let them, and they also allow us to use them to make us a better tomorrow. You can’t change your past, but you can be in control of today and set up the tomorrow that you want to have. It’s all your choice how you choose to look at it, how you choose to use it. I mean, I sure prefer accepting yesterday for what it was (because I can’t change it anyway), so I can let it go and be happy today. I used to dwell upon the past though. I kept repeating situations over and over, in life and in my head, feeling sorry for myself. Until I realized that the dwelling and the repeating made me feel worse than the situations I dwelled upon did. I made myself sick and miserable with staying stuck in the past. So I made the choice to try to see it all from the “outside” and take with me what I needed and I moved on. I made the choice to leave the past where it is, in the past, to remember the good things and to let go of the bad, because I can’t change it anyway.

To live in today is a much nicer way to live my life. Today is adjustable, today is changeable, today is where I am right now and it is all up to me what happens to it. And it is a thrilling and exciting feeling. And everything I do today is setting me up for the future. Everything I do today is creating my brand new ending, because no matter how hard I try and how much I want to, yesterday cannot be changed, but today and tomorrow can!